Why book this talk:

Because your audience will benefit from more than Instagram advice.
They need language for the ache they can’t name, tools, truth, & permission to re-choose. Shared by someone who’s lived it, studied it, and can teach it without shame.

Are you in your relationship because you honestly want it, or because it keeps you from feeling what you don’t want to face?

That question changes everything.

This talk goes beyond romance and right to the root of why we stay, or settle. Questioning why we open not always from freedom, but from fear?

Whether you’re monogamous, ENM, or somewhere in the middle of figuring your sh*t out, this session calls in every person who’s ever whispered:

“Maybe I’m here because it’s easier than leaving.”
“Maybe I’m opening this door because I’m scared to shut another.”

I don’t offer judgment. I offer clarity.
So you can stop pretending, stop performing, and start choosing the relationship that’s real for you.

Audiences will walk away with:

• Hard-but-honest reflection prompts to uncover the true “why” behind their relationship choices

• A breakdown of emotional defaults vs. conscious commitments

• Tools for interrupting people-pleasing, self-abandonment, and survival-mode love

• Language to have the scary conversations—without shutting each other down

• A renewed sense of agency in how they build, stay in, or exit their relationship.

Who it’s for:

• Couples at a crossroads

• Individuals questioning their next move

• Therapists and coaches supporting clients in monogamy, ENM, or transitions

• Anyone tired of calling it “connection” when it’s really just a distraction

Why this talk hits:

• Because most people have never been asked to examine the real reasons they say “yes” to love, commitment, or change.

• Because many couples say, “We’re thinking about opening up,” when what they really mean is… “We don’t know how to talk about the ache we’ve been avoiding.”

• Because healing starts before the rules are made, the play is planned, and before someone says, “Let’s try something different.”a

What to Know Before You Book

Do you speak at sexually explicit events?

Yes, with discernment. If the space is rooted in education, healing, identity, or liberation, I’m open to the conversation. I’m not here for shock value or adult-only content that exists just for clickbait. I won’t participate in anything exploitative, but I will absolutely sit on a porn panel if it’s thoughtful and intentional.

Do you speak at religious or conservative events?

I’m open, but I won’t dilute my message. If your community is ready for an honest and inclusive conversation about love, connection, and human relationships, I’m with you. If you’re hoping I’ll tone it down or skip over core truths to keep things “comfortable,” I’m not your speaker.

Will you debate monogamy vs. non-monogamy?

No. I don’t believe one structure is superior to the other. I believe in choice and agency. In alignment. Monogamy has value. Non-monogamy has value. I’m not here to pit them against each other. I’m here to help people understand their needs and build what actually works for them. No shame. No debate. Just options.

Will you tailor your talk for a monogamous audience?

Absolutely! My work centers on swinging and ethical non-monogamy, but the tools I teach are applicable to a broader range of relationships. Whether you’re monogamous, poly, open, or unsure, I customize the language and lens to meet your audience where they are.

Do you take every request?

No. I deeply respect my time, energy, and audience alignment. If I’m not the right fit, I’ll say so with love and I encourage you to do the same. This work is sacred to me, and I only show up where I can serve in full integrity.

Will you talk about sex or use graphic language?

I don’t teach sex. I don’t lead erotic how-tos, and I don’t offer explicit content. I focus on relationships. On the emotional tools, relational scaffolding, and inner clarity needed so that when sex is on the table, it doesn’t burn the house down. Phenomenal sex educators are doing that work, such as Goody Howard, but that’s not my lane. I teach people how to relate, not about sex. However, I do utilize adult language and will not shy away from those topics.